Comments on: Advice for divorced dads adjusting to change http://www.dadsclub.com.au/solo-dads-adjusting-to-change-6-tips/ Because becoming one is easier than being one. Fri, 09 Dec 2011 01:03:44 +1100 http://wordpress.org/?v=abc hourly 1 By: Fathers rights in Australia | DadsClub.com.au http://www.dadsclub.com.au/solo-dads-adjusting-to-change-6-tips/comment-page-1/#comment-1132 Fathers rights in Australia | DadsClub.com.au Sun, 16 May 2010 03:07:49 +0000 http://www.dadsclub.com.au/?p=2504#comment-1132 [...] solo-fathers – adjusting-to-change-6-tips [...] [...] solo-fathers – adjusting-to-change-6-tips [...]

]]> By: Josh http://www.dadsclub.com.au/solo-dads-adjusting-to-change-6-tips/comment-page-1/#comment-1116 Josh Sat, 08 May 2010 23:48:45 +0000 http://www.dadsclub.com.au/?p=2504#comment-1116 Children Need Consistent Parenting Establishing daily routines and rituals is comforting to children. So, both parents should do their best to rally and to keep household organization from going downhill. Each parent must try to recover a "bare minimum" working order within his or her own house. In tough times, kids crave (somewhat flexible) boundaries. Parents can establish a routine for everyone (in their own house) to follow, for things like: •Getting ready in the morning •Preparing and eating meals •Buying groceries •Transporting kids to school and sports •Doing homework •Times for rest and play •Bedtimes Putting effort into household management may sound like a boring chore, but common sense and research support this action as important for calming a child's fears. Using a routine chart (with pictures for younger children) can help kids adjust to their new lives. A Sense of Security “A sensible routine, with regular meals and regular times for shared recreation, translates into ‘home’, being cared about, and a sense of security,” according to Ms Ricci. And, this makes sense. Children may harbor an unspoken fear of a parent abandoning them. Any return to routine may allay these fears. Routine Helps Divorced Parents According to one father in Ricci’s book, "Knowing my kids needed that routine forced me to be orderly for at least part of my week. Even when I didn't think I could make dinner or read that bedtime story, I did it. It actually did make things easier – not only for them, but for me, too." •The earlier a family brings order back into their lives, the easier it is for everyone to readjust. Kids House Rules According to Ricci, “A sensible routine not only feels safe, it also allows our minds and bodies to calm down and heal. If your natural inclination is to be a relaxed and permissive parent, consider tightening up with a routine at least during your first year.” •Rules don't need to be exactly the same at both houses. •Somewhat similar rules, in both houses, mean less confusion for a constantly readjusting child. It makes sense that children can be stressed out by changes. To help a child feel happy, safe and loved, each parent may have to work a bit harder. In divorced life, a happy home is a home with reasonable and predictable ground rules. Taken from>>>http://divorce.suite101.com/article.cfm/making_a_happy_home_in_joint_custody_situations#ixzz0nNvLGy9g Children Need Consistent Parenting
Establishing daily routines and rituals is comforting to children. So, both parents should do their best to rally and to keep household organization from going downhill. Each parent must try to recover a “bare minimum” working order within his or her own house. In tough times, kids crave (somewhat flexible) boundaries.

Parents can establish a routine for everyone (in their own house) to follow, for things like:

•Getting ready in the morning
•Preparing and eating meals
•Buying groceries
•Transporting kids to school and sports
•Doing homework
•Times for rest and play
•Bedtimes
Putting effort into household management may sound like a boring chore, but common sense and research support this action as important for calming a child’s fears. Using a routine chart (with pictures for younger children) can help kids adjust to their new lives.

A Sense of Security
“A sensible routine, with regular meals and regular times for shared recreation, translates into ‘home’, being cared about, and a sense of security,” according to Ms Ricci. And, this makes sense. Children may harbor an unspoken fear of a parent abandoning them. Any return to routine may allay these fears.

Routine Helps Divorced Parents
According to one father in Ricci’s book, “Knowing my kids needed that routine forced me to be orderly for at least part of my week. Even when I didn’t think I could make dinner or read that bedtime story, I did it. It actually did make things easier – not only for them, but for me, too.”

•The earlier a family brings order back into their lives, the easier it is for everyone to readjust.
Kids House Rules
According to Ricci, “A sensible routine not only feels safe, it also allows our minds and bodies to calm down and heal. If your natural inclination is to be a relaxed and permissive parent, consider tightening up with a routine at least during your first year.”

•Rules don’t need to be exactly the same at both houses.
•Somewhat similar rules, in both houses, mean less confusion for a constantly readjusting child.
It makes sense that children can be stressed out by changes. To help a child feel happy, safe and loved, each parent may have to work a bit harder. In divorced life, a happy home is a home with reasonable and predictable ground rules.

Taken from>>>http://divorce.suite101.com/article.cfm/making_a_happy_home_in_joint_custody_situations#ixzz0nNvLGy9g

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