10 tips to being an awesome dad
Clearly no one sets out to be a lousy dad. But what does it take to be an awesome dad? Based on a recent poll we’ve found 10 tips to being an awesome dad:
- Patience: No matter how challenging the little blighters can be, try not to rush them.
- Lead by example. Sounds like some leadership course? We are their first role models. Let them see you take action on both good and bad observations e.g. congratulate or recognise a good deed.
- Invest time with them. There’s ongoing debate over what’s more important when it comes to time with kids: quality or quantity of time. We found kids are more chilled when they know you’re going to be around.
- Love ‘em no matter what! So they spewed over your suit before that business meeting, trashed the house, blew your credit card or ran over the dog. Love them, and let them know it, all the time.
- Enjoy life, have fun. Laugh, be active. Be enthusiastic about life and do stuff!
- Bring home the bacon. It’s a definite weight on our shoulders. But we do need to adequately shelter and feed our dependents. Sound primitive…welcome to the foundations of our lives. Do it well and do it with pride.
- Love their mother. Be sure your kids witness your unconditional love to her, at a minimum show respect.
- Don’t patronise. It’s important to explain and provide sound reasoning for your actions and requests.
- Time for discussion. Consider structuring the meal with everyone talking about their days’ highs and lows. You’ll be encouraged to see the discussion that emerges.
- It’s OK to show your vulnerability. By doing so you can lead by example and teach them how to cope as failure arise.
At a minimum, you should create an environment that builds their confidence, self esteem and critical thinking. These three attributes will be the backbone of their life successes.
Acknowledgments and references
Dadsclub.com.au forms its own opinion through its’ own expert contributors in addition to observations from third party literature, reviews, research, interviews and meetings.
Direct quotes will be referenced and acknowledged. Content from books and sites that have influenced a particular point of view will be referenced accordingly. In this instance:
Ian Bruce. 2005. How to be a great dad. Forward by Dr A Bradley. Foulsham. The Publishing House, Bennetts Close, Cippenham, Slough, UK.
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Fathers can be role models for their children in a variety of ways.
1) Respect Your Children’s Mother.One of the best things a father can do for his children is to respect their mother. A father and mother who respect each other, and let their children know it, provide a secure environment for them. When children see their parents respecting each other, they are more likely to feel that they are also accepted and respected.
2)Spend Time with Your Children.How a father spends his time tells his children what’s important to him. If you always seem to busy for your children, they will feel neglected no matter what you say. Treasuring children often means sacrificing other things, but it is essential to spend time with your children. Missed opportunities are forever lost.
3)Earn the Right to Be Heard.All too often the only time a father speaks to his children is when they have done something wrong. That’s why so many children cringe when their mother says, “Your father wants to talk with you.” Begin talking with your kids when they are very young so that difficult subjects will be easier to handle as they get older. Take time and listen to their ideas and problems.
4)Discipline with Love.All children need guidance and discipline, not as punishment, but to set reasonable limits. Remind your children of the consequences of their actions and provide meaningful rewards for desirable behavior. Fathers who discipline in a calm and fair manner show love for their children.
5)Be a Teacher.Too many fathers think teaching is something others do. But a father who teaches his children about right and wrong and encourages them to do their best, will see his children make good choices. Involved fathers use everyday examples to help their children learn the basic lessons of life.
6)Eat Together as a Family.Sharing a meal together can be an important part of healthy family life. In addition to providing some structure in a busy day, it gives kids the chance to talk about what they are doing and want to do. It is also a good time for fathers to listen and give advice. Most importantly, it is a time for families to be together each day.
7)Read to Your Children.In a world where television often dominates the lives of children, it is important that fathers make the effort to read to their children. Children learn best by doing and reading, as well as seeing and hearing. Begin reading to your children when they are very young. When they are older encourage them to read on their own. Instilling your children with a love for reading is one of the best ways to ensure they will have a lifetime of personal and career growth.
Taken from:
http://denver.yourhub.com/Parker/Stories/News/General-News/Story~651384.aspx
Another view of what it takes to be a great dad is in the link below….I reckon they have ommitted teaching your kids to be grateful and also best preparing your kids for failure. Chasing perenial success can often blow out a kids self esteem.
http://www.nashuatelegraph.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20090924/COLUMNISTS27/309249985/-1/news01&dsq=17354872#comment-17354872
1. Ask your kids:
» What can I do to be a better Dad?
» What can we do together to have more fun?
2. Engage in your children’s lives. Learn about their day.
3. Ask your wife for her ideas about connecting with your kids.
4. Appreciate that our children need to “Individuate”.
5. Learn from others. Talk with your friends.
6. Read the book “The 10 Best Gifts for Your Teen”
7. Make http://www.DadsForKids.org your homepage.
8. Bring “Best Practices” into your home.
9. Communicate with them. When we lecture we lose them.
10. Understand the balancing of YES and NO to our children’s requests.
11. Make a commitment to be your best for your family.
12. Appreciate that you will need to “Adjust the Plan”
From: http://www.dadsforkids.org
[...] See tips on being an awesome dad. [...]
John Lee, At My Fathers Wedding, describes 4 types of defective father figures…
1) The man who would be king: the one who works hard all day and comes home and expects to be treated like a king. AKA the “wait till your father fest home dad”
2)The critical father: Full of put-downs, driven by his own frustrations
3) The passive father: the one who gives up all duties, responsibilities and power to his wife, the mother
4) The absent father. He might have been capable , even powerful man, but not in the family arena. He was off having a career, returning late at night.
Are there any more stereotypes dads need to avoid?